Control Your Emotions Around Women
ONE MISTAKE ALMOST ALL MEN MAKE WITH WOMEN... AND
WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT
There is one critical mistake that almost all
men make with the women that they're REALLY attracted
This particular mistake is at the root of so many
different problems that men run into, that the topic
probably deserves a book to be written about it alone.
That mistake is allowing yourself to become OVERLY
EMOTIONAL around a woman at the wrong time, and screwing
up the great situation that you have by revealing the
fact that you're out of control.
When most of us guys see an attractive woman that
we'd like to meet, we FREAK OUT, become very nervous,
and literally become IMMOBILIZED.
This is a case of not being able to control your
When most of us guys have the phone in hand, and
we're getting ready to call a girl to ask her out,
we FREAK OUT, and again, we become so nervous that
This is another case of not being able to control
When most of us guys think that it might be time
to KISS a girl, we FREAK OUT.
When a woman won't call back, we get upset.
When a woman tests us by challenging something we
say, we become nervous and unsure.
The point I'm making here is that if you allow
yourself to become TOO emotional in situations with
women, it will screw you up. Guaranteed.
It's happened to all of us many times, and it's
a UNIVERSAL experience.
But wait a minute.
Emotions are GOOD THINGS, aren't they?
Aren't emotions the thing that allow us to really
And isn't it wrong to try to "control how you feel"?
Isn't it better to just "be who you are" and not try
to beat yourself up because you feel a certain way?
Have you ever heard a woman (or a man) say "I can't
help the way I feel"...?
We all have.
We even have TERMS that we use to describe when
we're overly upset and just need to "get it out".
We call it "venting" and such.
The implication here is that in our modern 21st
century society, it's OK to be upset, to get emotional,
and to show how you feel...
But is this always true?
TWO KINDS OF EMOTIONS
I think that emotions come in "two flavors".
There are those that you could consider "positive"
emotions, or those based in "joy", and there are "negative"
emotions, or those based in "fear".
In other words, there are the emotions that make
you "feel good" and emotions that make you "feel bad".
In addition, we all know that emotions aren't like
In other words, when you feel an emotion, you usually
feel an AMOUNT of it. Maybe it's just a little, or
maybe it's very strong.
But the reality is that when an emotion starts
to become too strong, it literally TAKES OVER your
mind and body.
In some situations, this can be a very powerful
POSITIVE thing for a person.
Imagine your favorite musician or actor giving
a world-class performance... you can literally FEEL
the emotions they're feeling. It can be an amazing
experience when they allow their emotions to take
But it can also be a very powerful NEGATIVE thing
Like when you're looking across the room at a beautiful
woman you'd like to talk to, and you become so nervous
that you make yourself sick.
Emotions can actually CONTROL you.
And when an emotion becomes so strong that it actually
DOES "take over", you're out of control.
Strong emotions also create strong MEMORIES.
We tend to remember things better if we were feeling
a strong emotion when they happened.
I can remember so many situations where I was too
nervous to talk to a girl, or too nervous to ask her
out, or whatever.
I can remember situations TWENTY YEARS AGO vividly...
where I was so nervous in the situation that the emotion
burned the image into my mind.
When this kind of thing happens a lot (like it has
with me), it starts to make a "feedback loop". In other
words, most of the strong memories I had about women
were situations where I SCREWED UP... so I had less
and less confidence as the years went by.
Give me a little silent nod here if you know what
I'm talking about.
CONTROLLING YOUR EMOTIONS
I'm sure you've already figured out that I'm going
to suggest that you learn how to control your emotions
in situations with women.
Let me talk for a moment about the reasons WHY it's
important to do this.
Remember, when it comes to ATTRACTION, all of the
"normal" rules change.
You have to stop thinking about what you've learned
about being a "nice guy" to other people, and realize
that a woman's ATTRACTION isn't triggered by you being
So I have TWO good reasons why need to learn how
to control your emotions around women:
- If your emotions take control early on, you probably
won't even be able to talk to her, call her, or ask
her out. You'll just be too freaked out to even make
your first move.
- Women aren't ATTRACTED to guys who let their emotions
control them all the time. This is ESPECIALLY true
when the guy acts like a WUSSY.
We talked about the first reason already.
Let's talk about the second one.
Why don't women like guys who are overly-emotional
Because women NEVER feel ATTRACTION for men that
they can CONTROL.
The more control a woman has over you, the less
ATTRACTION she feels for you.
The less of a CHALLENGE you are, and the more PREDICTABLE
you become, the less ATTRACTION she feels. It's very
To put it another way, if you're the type of guy
who lets his emotions TAKE OVER, then you need to learn
how to control them.
If you don't, you're going to have a VERY hard
time succeeding with women.
THE FIRST STEP...
I think that the first step in learning how to
control your STRONG emotions is to realize how they're
Most strong emotions are TRIGGERED.
Something happens that "pushes a button" inside
of you and BAM!... the emotion happens before you
even have a chance to think about it.
But the fact is that these "triggers" have a structure
There are all kinds of little things that happen
during that "trigger".
One of the biggest insights that I've had about
these "triggers" is that they're usually caused by
making something that happens MEAN something.
In other words, it's not the actual situation itself
that "pulls the trigger" or "pushes the button"... it's
what you think it MEANS.
For instance, let's say that you've met a cute girl,
gotten her number, and called her on the phone... she
wasn't home, so you left a message for her.
She doesn't call back.
What do we, as guys, usually think?
"Maybe she doesn't like me. Maybe she has a boyfriend.
Maybe she's trying to avoid me. If I call her again,
maybe she'll reject me."
In other words, we make the fact that she didn't
call back MEAN all these different things.
Another HUGE insight I've had in this area is that
us guys allow our imaginations to take over and imagine
the WORST possible outcomes of situations.
Then we get nervous about that outcome happening,
and we FREAK.
For instance... have you ever seen a girl that you
wanted to approach... but all you could imagine was
her REJECTING you?
Or you were with a woman on a date, and you wanted
to kiss her... and all you could imagine was her getting
upset or pushing you away?
Don't worry, we all do it.
The point is that most of us guys use our minds
to imagine the WORST possible outcomes for situations...
and it pushes all the wrong buttons, and gets us all
nervous and upset... which, of course, makes us screw
When it comes to women, it's important that you lose
the need to make everything MEAN something... and STOP
imagining the worst.
Think about those situations when a woman doesn't
call you back... or plays hard to get.
As guys, we immediately start to wonder where she
is... what she's doing... and who she's with.
We make pictures of her out with other guys, doing
fun things without us, etc. and we let it upset us.
This is the kind of thing that makes us do all KINDS
of stupid, Wussy things that scare women away... like
calling 100 times a day, asking where she was and what
she was doing, etc.
Instead, start doing yourself a favor and:
- Imagining the BEST possible outcome.
- Making things mean something GOOD.
If she doesn't call you back, imagine that she
probably didn't get the message (maybe her roommate
erased it), and make it mean that when she finally
DOES hear from you, she's going to be even MORE interested
because it took you so long to call her.
If she plays hard to get, realize that she's only
doing that because she REALLY likes you... and that
it's almost inevitable that you're going to get together
Does this stuff sound strange?
Well, I'll tell you something...
All of the guys I know who are the BEST with women
think this way. This is how their minds operate.
I used to be VERY negative. I thought that every
situation was going to go wrong, and that everything
women did meant that they somehow didn't like me.
It's taken me awhile, but I've changed my own thinking
so it's now more positive and optimistic.
And guess what?
Now women are FAR more attracted to me.
In fact, it's almost like magic. The more I expect
things to go well, the better they go. Try it, it
Also, start noticing those particular things and
situations that trigger your "overpowering" emotions.
Learn to spot the signs that it's about to happen,
and then learn how to keep yourself cool, calm, and
If you can learn how to do this, your success with
women will improve DRAMATICALLY.
Now, this is just the tip of the iceberg, so to
It's also important to learn how to improve your
self image, overcome FEAR, maintain your physical
composure, and communicate using your body language...
so that you're successful in each situation with women.
Where can you learn every one of my best personal
techniques for this stuff?
Try my Advanced Dating Techniques program.
In that program I'll teach you all of the techniques
that I use personally to get these areas under control...
and take each situation that you find yourself in with
women and turn it into a success.
You'll learn step-by-step techniques and systems that
you won't find ANYWERE else. I guarantee it.
If you REALLY want to learn some powerful techniques
for controlling your emotions around women, then this
is the way to learn them.
All the details are here, along with some great free
audio and video samples:
And if you haven't read my online eBook "Double Your
Dating", then you need to do that right now. You can
download it and be reading it in just a few minutes
from right now. It's here:
I'll talk to you again soon.
P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story,
Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:
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because this helps other guys to see what's
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